A take on the teacher's take

Graham LockettContributorThis article is written with the purpose of clarifying the statements made by science teacher Graham Lockett in the past issue of “The Samohi.”So apparently my article evoked quite a wave of controversy amongst the female student population.  Apparently I have been called things like misogynist, bully, insensitive, judgmental.  As a result, I have been asked to provide a bit more context and clarity to my words, which I am more than happy to do.  However, I will start this off by saying that if you are hoping for an apology, you will not find one here.  It’s “Honest Circle” time, ladies.When I was pitched with the piece about fashion trends, I was told that it was supposed to be satirical; a humorously biting editorial on certain widespread and sometimes ill-advised clothing choices made on campus.  Unfortunately that was not made clear enough to certain readers, particularly students who are not enrolled in my class and who don’t understand my personality, and who firmly believe I was calling them overweight in their high-waisted shorts.  Just for the record, I don’t think anybody should ever wear high-waisted shorts.  Ever.In light of being deemed too judgmental for an authority figure, I think it is time for you ladies (and gentlemen for that matter) to understand something extremely important:  every time you wake up in the morning and step out into the world, you are being judged.  This may not necessarily be as overt as a direct comment to you about your physical appearance, but you are inadvertently being judged for something .  In fact, think back on your day so far.  Have you had an opinion on what someone else was wearing today, or how they looked?  Probably.  The fact of the matter is you cannot simply look at a person for the first time and know about their intelligence or numerous accomplishments; you can only base your opinions on what they are physically presenting to the world.  I never said this was fair, but it is the world we live in.Actually, any job interview you will ever have is a huge judgment fest; they are judging to see if you are going to be a good fit for the position/company you are applying for.  Sure you may have a great resume, but the unfortunate reality about the world we live in is that appearances matter, far more than they should.  You will come to realize that it is not so much about your amazing accomplishments in your past (although that can help get you a foot in the door).  No, it will come ultimately down to how personable you are and how you conduct/present yourself, and that includes what you decide to put on your body that day (knowing someone in the industry who can recommend you doesn’t hurt either).What you deem misogynistic on my part is actually coming from a very feministic place. Yes, men can be feminists, too.  Do I think it is okay that women are still objectified and treated as if they were subservient to men?  Absolutely not.  Do I think that dressing provocatively does you any favors to achieve this sense of respect and equality?  Probably not, but it is your right to dress however you see fit. To me, it denotes a lack of self-respect and you not seeing yourself as a woman meant to be taken seriously.  As an educator, I can see the intelligent woman underneath all of that make up. I just wish that you would see it for yourself.I think you also need to ask yourselves a very important question: why are you letting the opinions of a balding 25 –year- old Chemistry teacher (that you probably have never even met before) affect you so much?  This gives me the impression that you are not 100% confident in the fashion choices you are making.  As I said before, you will be under the scrutiny of others for an unforeseeable amount of time.  With this in mind, I see two primary options for happiness: First, if you are unhappy with something related to your fashion choices, than change it.  Ultimately following the trends of other students isn’t going make you fulfilled, choosing what YOU want to wear will make you much happier in the long run.  The other option: you need to develop a thicker skin, and care less about what people think of your exterior, particularly those who don’t know you for who you are on the inside.You think what I said was rude/insensitive?  Welcome to the real world; it’s an unapologetically insensitive place outside these school walls.  If I cared what people thought about me and my fashion choices, I wouldn’t be a teacher (because let’s be real, y’all are REAL judgey).  It is a matter of you waking up and making the decision to say “Wow, I look and feel great in this outfit; I’m gonna work it.”  Sure I may have my reservations about high-waisted shorts, but if you like them and you think you look good in them, then who cares?  Do you, Boo Boo? Because when legitimate bullies start to antagonize you about your physical appearance (and it will probably happen, regardless of who you are), you are the only person who can prevent what they say from bothering you.I want to close by saying something that pertains to both students AND teachers (because we aren’t immune to judgments either):  I think a lot of/all of us make choices that we hope get the attention of others to a certain degree, whether it be trying to attract the person you’re interested in by dressing a certain way, or hoping your friends will notice the new way you wear your hair.  At the end of the day, YOU are the only person you should be worried about impressing.  Regardless of who is in your life now, or ten years from now (because believe me, they will NOT be the same group of people), you will ALWAYS have yourself, and as a famous drag queen once said, “If you don’t love yourself, how in the hell you gonna love somebody else?”