Weird relatives: just as festive as the Christmas goose
Sophie Salem, Staff Writer
Bizarre relatives. That yearly awkward and confusing experience. Why do we all have those weird family members at the holiday dinner table? Well luckily this is a universal issue and it’s not just you. Here are some of our favorite yet weird stories.
Oh, Uncle Tony. Every year he brings up his girlfriend. The only thing is, it’s a new girl every single year. Three years ago it was Julie, the year after that it was Jamie, last year it was Jenna; I wonder what it’ll be this year. I think he has a thing with the letter J. He thinks he’s the cool uncle, but he actually just talks the entire dinner and never lets me get a word in. Not to mention, he asks me about school with his mouth full of mashed potatoes. Oh, Uncle Tony.
Then there’s cousin Bobby. He’s 22 but still sits at the kids table only to talk about his tech job or something. No one ever knows what he’s talking about and we sometimes wonder if he even has a job. Last year he asked me how third grade was going. I laughed for a second but then froze when I saw he had a straight face. Does he know I’m in highschool? I hope I don’t actually look like I’m in third grade.
I almost forgot about my grandma. She always strolls in an hour and a half late with a leather jacket and her high top Converse. Of course, she heads directly to the food table without saying hello to anyone. Every year it’s the same routine.
“Hi Grandma, how are you?”
“I like your jacket,” I say.
“Grandma?”
She then proceeds to ask for someone to pass the salt. I guess Grandma is only looking forward to leaving this get together on her new Vespa.
Well, good luck with your holiday season this year. Hopefully you don’t have to spend a dinner with these kinds of relatives, but at least you’re not alone.
